Tuesday, October 09, 2007

It's Only a Flesh Wound

The sisters are continuing to enjoy the sights and sounds of the tropics and Hawaii has not moved to secede from the Union... so all is well. Relatively speaking.

The sisters have not stopped their antics since they arrived in Hawaii. No, indeed. They go from tour bus to tour bus, stopping and enjoying the scenery, only to reload said tour bus and start again. They have traveled the island far and wide. They have gone to Pearl Harbor and the USS Arizona. They have island hopped to the Big Island and toured the volcanoes. They have attended luaus... and they have eaten flowers.

They don't taste like chicken, by the way.

I did receive a phone call on Saturday evening as I was walking into my nephew's football game. It was my mother and she was laughing so hard, she could barely speak. This always bodes for some new and exciting adventure... and some sort of upset as well. This time was no different.

Apparently the sisters were headed to some sort of show they had paid good money to see. One of those floating boat shows where the hula dancers move gracefully over the water and the men twirl flaming batons about. It was something to behold.

My aunt hates water. Have I ever mentioned that before? She does. She has a less than healthy fear of the water and I'm not exactly sure where the fear originates, but it is there. Can she swim? Yes. But she would rather not. She doesn't mind being near and in the water, as long as it is no deeper than her ankles.

Saturday night the sisters were instructed by a well-meaning gentleman that if they crossed a small body of water (via stepping stones) they would have better seats with which to see the show. He did not instruct that said stones would be slippery and of course, who would fall in the water and fear drowning? My aunt.

Before you berate me for my lack of sympathy here at my aunt's fear and her worry of drowning, let me advise you that the water was about two feet deep. Once her baby sister's demise was less than imminent, my mother began laughing her fool head off, took said baby sister to a first aid room to see to the scrapes and swelling of her knee, and promptly called me to explain what had happened... except she was laughing so hard I couldn't understand anything that was being said and she cut off the connection anyway.

I am certain that I do not have all the details of the story right... as it was difficult to understand between the gasps of laughter that were exploding from both sisters. But, all is seemingly well. They will not be stopped. They have since purchased an Ace bandage for my aunt's knee and hopefully some Ibuprofen to help with the swelling... and they march magnificently onward...

... laughing all the way.

Thursday, October 04, 2007

So Far So Good...

Thelma and Louise have been officially in Hawaii for two days now and nothing catostrophic has occurred. At least, nothing that has been reported via cell phone or made the national headlines. I am certain that many things have occurred, but the island is still safe for habitation and it appears the plant life is still in tact.

They left Little Rock at the crack of dawn (literrally) to take a puddle jumper to Chicago where there was... surprise, surprise... an almost two hour delay. It appears that the original plane was having maintenance issues and they were sent to another gate to board a second plane. The sisters had to move quickly as the seating was on a first come-first serve basis... and they were not the only people headed to Hawaii.

There was a gentleman who had taken their picture whilst waiting in line at the first gate and so the sisters thought to follow him, assuming he knew where he was going. He did know where he was going, and thanks to Janelle, my mother did not follow the man into the men's room. As she started to walk in, Janelle grabbed the back of her shirt and kept her from scaring the pants off any number of men who were in the business of doing their business.

As it seems, their 9:15 plane finally took off at about 11:05 and they were on their way to paradise. The flight took close to nine hours and they were appalled and dismayed that there was no food service on the flight. Oh, don't mistake... there was food... you just had to pay for it and the sisters dished out $10 for two turkey sandwiches during their flight.

Papa Bear and I kept an eye on their whereabouts via http://www.flightstats.com/ which allow us to see where they were located, their altitude, and other wondrous information that was meaningless to us. The sisters did not sleep on the plane and when they landed, it was 3:00 in the afternoon. They were quite hungry and managed to get themselves in to the hotel and get some dinner... at which point they both crashed and burned and slept the rest of the day/night away.

Which was a good thing since they were up again at the crack of dawn to load onto a tour bus for a day-long sightseeing trip that took them all over the island of Oahu. They called in the evening and let me know they had seen some surfers and to remind me that I really do need to go to the island at my earliest convenience. Yeah. I'm all about that!

Today they plan to tour the USS Arizona and Pearl Harbor. So far, they have fought the desire to eat any of the plant life... but there is plenty of time for that!

Monday, October 01, 2007

Is that a Tsunami? No... It's the Sisters!

Watch out Pacific coast! Hang on to your surfboards all you North Shore-ers... the Lovitt Sisters are headed to Hawaii for their next great adventure. The natives will be restless until they leave the islands in tact... and it is doubtful there will be much tact once these two hit the south pacific!

After a weekend roller coaster of emotions, Papa Bear was proclaimed in good health and so Thelma and Louise did not have to cancel their vacation after all and will be leaving out tomorrow morning bright and early to start their newest journey.

So far it has been pretty good. KT and I took Nana to Memphis on Sunday to meet up with the other side of the family.
KT regaled us with her own brand of "KT Science", namely the fact that when she gets goose bumps, or chill bumps, the hairs on her legs grow at an astronomical rate. Nana and I laughed so hard as to almost have to pull over, but we made it on to Memphis where we joined up with Little Sister and my cousin for some shopping (I mean, come on... there's a MALL there) and eating out at Chili's. KT was appalled to know that Nana can fit everything she will need for 10 days in Hawaii in a carry-on bag with only two pair of shoes. KT needs a different pair of shoes for each day she will be on vacation. Little did she know that Nana packed and repacked her bag so often she may end up in the Guiness Book of World Records. Word has it on good authority today that they have repacked four more times... though Lil Sister repacked six, because twice she picked up her bag without closing it and had to put everything that was dumped out back in. Nothing but good times ahead.

Not to think that Thelma and Louise would be outdone by KT's Science, their minds have worked their own type of knowledge... namely dealing with my mother's lack of sense of smell. That's right... Ma Bell can't smell nuthin'. I always told her that was why she could eat cooked cabbage... because she couldn't smell it.

Lil Sis hates that Big Sis will not fully enjoy the magic of the islands... that is, the floral smells that permeate the air. They have, therefore, deduced that since my mother's taste is not affected by her sense of smell... perhaps she would appreciate the scent of the island if she were to taste the flowers there... instead of sniffing away at nothing at all.

Of course, you can't plan to experiment with science of this magnitude without testing it first... so once they returned from running errands today, Mom sat down and munched on a magnolia blossom.

I am praying they will not be arrested for chowing down on the Hawaiian state flower.
There is nothing like a dame... unless it is these two!

Hi-Ho, Hi-Ho, Back to the ER We Go...

Ahh... the joys of the ER. I must say, I have seen the inside of the ER at Stone Crest Medical Center more this year than I have EVER seen in my life. Katy was there once. I was there once and now my father has been there twice. We love the ER there... and the personnel. They are fabulous and we couldn't be happier.

Well... I guess we'd be happier if we weren't going to the ER every so often.

That's right, girls and boys... the Bell family made their way back to the ER on Saturday night with Papa Bell to make sure that a little problem he was having wasn't a BIG problem.

After the maternal unit forced me to see the Jungle Book version that Cirque brought to Nashville (pretty costumes and sets... but honestly how many times does that little Mongolian girl have to turn herself into a pretzel before I'm heading towards the door?) we returned home to find Papa Bear in the recliner and waiting to tell us "THE NEWS." I won't fill you in on the details, but suffice it to say, THE NEWS was enough for us to take him back to the ER with a piece of toilet paper in a Ziploc baggie. 'Nuff said? I sure hope so.

We arrived much the same way we did the first time... me paving the way and requesting the assistance of a wheelchair and this time the nurse who arrived was taller and bigger than me (no small feat... get it?! Ha. I crack myself up) and she whisked Dad into the admitting area again where the same little nurse took his vitals, etc. and he was settled into a room.

The eldest of the Bell offspring was with me this time and we waited in the waiting room for them to get Dad settled and then we hung out in Room 20 to get our groove on and the party started whilst waiting for the doctor.

And guess what!? The doctor was the same ER physician that I saw when I had my gall bladder removed. (Insert song: It's a Small World After All) We reintroduced ourselves and I told him he had seen me back in April, and he was pleased to know I was still living. He took the Bear's history and listened and when Dad said he was eating Pepto Bismal tablets (a fact I didn't know at the time) (because the GI doctor told him too) he stopped us right there and called me over to see his chart.

"Can you read?"

"Um... yes..."

"Come here and read what I have written on my chart."

Looks at the chart and tries to make out the doctor's hand-writing.

"Pepto Bismal."

"That's right. When you take a lot of Pepto, the acids in your stomach turn it black, and it makes your poop black too."

Dad: "Do you mean, I came to the ER because of Pepto Bismal?"

"Pretty much."

Because of Dad's previous issues, they went ahead and did lab work and the doctor tested the poopy toilet tissue... all the lab work was normal and no blood in the poopy... which means Mom gets to go to Hawaii on Tuesday after all.

Dad got to go home and eat a cheeseburger. All is well again in the world.

... as far as we know.